Soccer – The Most Important of Life’s Unimportant Things

February 27, 2006


by @ 10:46 pm.
Filed under The International Game, US National Team, World Cup

Okay, it’s just a rumor. And, frankly, a rumor that I’ve just started, here in this very forum

But read this quote from il Bruce’s recent interview with, and tell me if it’s a little less outlandish than it might have been just a few weeks ago:

Your record at International level speaks for itself. Do you have aspirations to test yourself in European club football and could we see you managing in the Premiership one day?

I do have aspirations to coach in Europe. I would love to have an opportunity to manage in the Premiership. As with any manager or player, moving to a new club or country requires a period of adjustment. However, I believe with the right club and the right time to adjust, I could be successful.

Hmm…. Manchester United is owned by Americans . . . Bruce has a good World Cup . . . Fergie’s about ready to retire . . . hmm…..

Remember you heard it here first.

(Thanks to the always high-quality du nord for the link)

February 13, 2006


by @ 2:02 pm.
Filed under Miscellany

I’m marrying a Chelsea fan.

And not only that, it’s my fault she’s a Chelsea fan.

See, a year ago, she didn’t even care about soccer. All she cared about was Notre Dame football. But then we started hanging out. A lot. You know, like people who are going to end up married do. Part of that involved watching lots of English soccer on Saturdays and Sundays. She would watch it with me, initially, because she’s just a good natured woman and wanted to show interest in something that I am, to put it mildly, interested in.

Well, then, after a few months, she started getting into it. And one fateful Saturday, while we were watching Chelsea thrash someone on Fox Soccer Channel, she noticed two things. One, that Arjen Robben is really, really good. Two, that Jose Mourinho is a suave, debonair, Euro-slick lookin’ sonovagun.

She was hooked. She was a Chelsea fan. Not just a Chelsea fan, but, like, a rabid, obnoxious, hates-every-other-team-in-England Chelsea fan. As if this wasn’t bad enough, she has started making these little “ooh” and “ahh” sounds whenever she watches that stupid American Express commercial (you know, the one where the great Mourinho utters those immortal words of soccer wisdom: “zhu hef to bloke th’ keeper, an zhu haf to beleef you can score”).

Not that this makes me love her any less. Rather, it’s all very cute and endearing. The only catch is that I despise Chelsea, and because of certain fundamental personality flaws that are deeply ingrained in my psyche, I am all but completely unable to keep my mouth shut about the fact that I despise Chelsea.

I mean, I can’t even point out that Arjen Robben looked like a diving little Dutch sissy-boy the other day when Jose Reina pushed him down (with no more effort than it takes to shoo a fly) without her getting extrememely emotional and irrational.

It really is great fun.

Anyway, we’re getting married in two days, and I’m really looking forward to a lifetime of arguments about whether Roman Abramovich is the George Steinbrenner of Russia, and lots of fun stuff like that.

February 8, 2006


by @ 11:17 pm.
Filed under Pictures

Soccer Eyes


by @ 8:06 pm.
Filed under The International Game

So I’m watching Chelsea and Everton play their FA Cup 4th Round replay today, and it occurs to me that the field looks like my backyard after a heavy rain, except my backyard has more grass.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but doesn’t Roman Abramovich own all the oil in Russia or something? Didn’t the man just spend something on the order of 150 million dollars on players?

You’d think the guy could spring for 100 grand or so to get some grass laid down, wouldn’t you?

Instead of spending $5 million on Freddy Adu, he needs to call George Toma and see what it will take to get him over there.


by @ 8:48 am.
Filed under The International Game

Tottenham Hotspur and Egypt prima-donna Mido went ballistic upon being subbed out for Amr Zaki with 11 minutes remaining in Egypt’s semifinal match with Senegal in the African Cup of Nations. Quoth the official Egyptian new agency MENA: “Ahmed Hossam Mido objected to Hassan Shehata and expressed his anger at his decision to substitute him yesterday…using unacceptable language with Shehata when he left the pitch.”

To get the real scoop, though, you have to go to Agence French-Presse, who report the following dialogue between coach and player:

“Why are you taking me off?” asked a furious Mido.

“Because I am the coach,” replied Shehata.

“You are nothing but a donkey!” stormed Mido.

“No it is you who is the donkey,” replied Shehata.

Boy, you gotta hand it to those Egyptians when it comes to witty repartee’.

So here’s the best part of the whole story: Mido’s substitute, Zaki, takes the field and promptly scores the winning goal. Sweet justice.

Mido gets a six-month ban from the Egyptian national team for his troubles (ooooooh, harsh); all it really means is that he misses the final against Cote d’Ivoire this weekend.


by @ 12:28 am.
Filed under Major League Soccer

I haven’t posted since NOVEMBER!

Ugh. Let’s see what’s going on:

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